You Are Not Alone

You are not alone!

If you are in the midst of struggle, of being bullied, or ostracized for your beliefs, your gender, your sexual orientation, your ideas, and what you want out of life I want you to know that you are not alone. Others stand with you. The more of us who will stand up for love saying no to hate, exclusion, and bullying the better it will get, the easier it will be to defeat the evil in the world.

I often call myself a purple marble in a bag of black and whites. Growing up and even now, I feel like I don’t belong in my family, school, church, and work. I grew up LDS and I never felt like I belonged. I didn’t fit the mold and never would. I was bullied and excluded at school. I had a few friends, yet for mostly I felt like I stuck out like a throbbing, sore thumb. My parents loved me and have done so much for me, yet there are certain family members that would rather I not be around. At work, I also felt like I didn’t belong, I was never in the ‘in’ group. At my last job, my manager didn’t like me and made my job a nightmare.

I am only saying this because I want to let you know it does get better. I am not Mormon any more, if I ever was. I am Christian—a follower of Jesus Christ and belong to a wonderful, yet imperfect church and I am now taking steps to becoming a Pastor. I am going after my bachelor’s degree and at school while I don’t have friends a handful of people converse with and seem to be glad I am there. My teachers want to help me succeed. I walk down the hall and people, both teachers and students say hi. My family life can still be touchy. My parents, though I thank God for my parents even when they annoy me. In my current job, I am happy, it’s not my dream job yet I am happy to be there and it seems they are happy to have me there.

It gets better.

We need to grow into our true self and as we do we will find people and situations that honor and love who we really are. We are children of God and as we grow into our divine birthright as images of God, we will know that it does get better. It’s not about being any different from who we really are. It’s about being better than we used to be, about becoming the answer we are looking for.

I am ready to be the person I should be, yet I know I am not there, but I am ready to be the real me. The me that God made me to be. If I scorn who God made me to be, I will be scorning the plans He has made for me. Jesus in John’s Gospel says I came that they may have life, and have it to the full. A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.

I am ready to sing my song. I will not die with my song locked up in my heart. I will live now and for the rest of my life singing my song.

It gets better.

I want to experience all life has to offer and live life to the full. I want to share my life with someone special and be in community with others who feel the same as I do. I want to be in the world and not of the world. I don’t want to hide in a monastery or under my bed, but face the world knowing that as I do God is with me and God loves me.

This does not mean I must stop my thinking, seeking, and learning; that I must not be creative or curious; that I must conform to some idealized mold even a Christian one. It means to continue thinking, seeking, and learning for myself and to share what I find with others. It means that I will ever so slowly become more of the person God made me to be. God had a plan for my life even before my parents met and considered building a life and family together. Everything that has happened to me, both the good and bad happened so that I might experience the unlimited and unconditional love and grace of God.

It gets better. Yes, it does!

My prayer for you today is that you begin singing your song today and I will join with you and our symphony will overpower the hate and evil present in the world.


1 Comment

  1. This is an incredible post. I really appreciate how real you are. I’m concerned about people today, and I’m afraid that in so many ways the church is a little out of touch with people today…or maybe it’s just that people perceive the church as being full of people who are a certain way, people whose lives are practically perfect in every way. I’m so grateful for all that God has done and continues to do in your life. Your perspective is so genuine. There is so much that God can do with a guy like you. I hope you don’t get tired of me saying, “thanks for sharing” but I really do mean it.

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